インターネット

昨日、私がどれだけインターネットを必要としているか思い知らされた。i hate how depend i am on it, but i probably seriously would not be able to live without internet anymore.

anyways, my internet provider in Time Warner Cable. and you know what? they SUCK ASS! really. it's slow and there are lots of outages... -_- 本当に頼りない。昨日もそうだった。we never really got the internet back last night. and wanna hear what happened when i called to complain?? after being on hold for 30 minutes, they disconnected me... i was like "WHAT!?" めっちゃムカつく。最悪。マジで。i really hate time warner. there's nothing good from them.

ま、インターネットなしでは生きれないこのご時世、一晩だけでも無理ですね。くそったれぇぇぇぇぇぇ。hmph.

Currently listening to: 小さな恋の歌 - モンゴル800

Running

so, it has been decided that our entire apartment will go running every week. that's good for me since i need to loose some fatty. hehe :)

our first day was yesterday, tuesday. (we're gonna go every tuesday). 結果は、i ran 3/4 mile and walked another 1/2 mile. 結構疲れた。でも、最後に走ったのが、高校の sophomore year (that's when i last had p.e. 懐かしい～) だから、結構走ったと思う。自分では。

今朝、起きたら思ったほど筋肉痛にはならなかったみたい。良かった。but it's still kinda sore... hehe.

Currently listening to: 上海ハニー - ORANGE RANGE

I LOVE...

to eat and watch tv. oh, and sleep too.
maybe that's why i get fat.

no, that is not a self portrait...

damn it.

Currently listening to: ひまわり - 遊助

for you, Dusty...

over the weekend, the bf showed me a video of animal abuse that was circulating on the internet. a gray cat named Dusty was being slammed against the wall and repeatedly beaten by a 16-year old boy while his brother filmed it. people like that disgust me. 世の中そういう人間だけではないことは分かっているが、ああいう映像を見ると反吐がでる。「あんたらみたいな人間が世の中だめにするんだよ」って感じ。

people on the internet were able to track down the boy and posted his information online. 怖いね。インターネットって。何でもできちゃう。since, the boy has been arrested, along with his brother. for the full story, click here.

i think people like that should go through what they made others go through. torture doesn't get much prison time. if their punishment was to have what they did to others unto themselves, i think it'll serve as a good punishment. 「ざまあみろ！」だね。

a couple of other cats were rescued from the house as well and are up for adoption. i hope they find good homes :)

Currently listening to: NEW LIFE - GReeeeN

President's Day Bonanza

man, yesterday was a pretty long day. haha. it was fun overall tho. let's see... i first slept over at the bf's house. 寒かった～。he keeps taking the blanket from me! >:( で、朝起きてから、ちょっとモールにお買い物～♪ we went to AE and i found some stuff that i liked でも．．．高すぎる。we did some shopping for the bf.

その後は、小東京に行ってランチ。we went to the new place in weller court. 2F. chi-ma-ya? i think is what it's called. i like it :) then, it's off to kinokuniya. 新しいシリーズ始めました！！「黒執事」。そこそこ面白そう？i just started reading it so not too sure yet.
で、その後は、カラオケ～♪。歌いまくったぜ。のどが痛くなったぜ。あはは。でも、楽しかった。it was 結構久しぶり。after the karaoke, we went home and watched "Super Bad". more like finished watching it. a bit dumb. some funny parts. was an eh movie.
for dinner, we went to a chinese restaurant in san gabriel to celebrate the bf's lil sis's birthday :) it was まぁまぁ。サービスがあんまり．．．but man, we had live prawns, and the thing cost $40/lb!!!!! unbelievable. we got so just the prawns cost us $80. 高いよぉぉぉぉぉぉぉ。ご馳走様でした。i feel a bit bad since i always go to those family dinner things and いつもご馳走になる。すみません。

after dinner, the bf and i go to best buys and he gets himself an mp3 player. it's a sony. i get his old one. yay! ただより安い物はない! hehe.

once we get home, i borrowed the shower and afterwards, movie time again! we watched 「隠し砦の三悪人 THE LAST PRINCESS」。it's a japanese movie that got quite a lot of publicity. i only watch half of it tho. hopefully, i can finish it up soon. でも見た限りは結構面白そうだったけどね。
ま、そんなこんなで結構色々ありましたね。昨日は。楽しかった。too bad i didn't end up studying at all for my midterm wednesday... o wells.

Currently listening to: 扉 - GReeeeN

ヤバイ

頭痛い
めまいがする
調子悪い
元気でない
疲れた
しんどい

以上。

心細い

today, i had a midterm, so last night, i spent quite a bit of time studying. i might have been a bit irritated. what pushed me over the edge was my mom. 何度も何度も電話かけてきては用事を言いつけてくる。すごい苛々した。but it's my mom. so i do as she says. even if it means i'm half crying by the time i'm done. (i tend to cry when i'm really stressed or mad. i hate it but there's not much i can do about it)

after finishing up with my mom, i was able to talk to my bf. 当然母のことで愚痴ることになる。but you know what he says!? "don't pick up" -_- それができたら苦労しないし．．．挙句の果てには he says it's my fault... that got me really mad too. and then he gets mad. why? because apparently i was 機嫌悪い。doesn't make much sense.

it seems like my bf can only look at things from his perspective. his family is relatively lenient and he can do pretty much whatever he wants. but that's not the kind of environment i grew up in. こっちはすごい厳しかったし、母の言うことはいくら理不尽でも絶対だった。plus, i have an older sister with mental retardation to take care of. but all the bf says is that i should rebel. 無理だって。それでなくても母はほぼ女手一つで姉と私を育ててくれた。それなりに恩義は感じてる。he just doesn't understand.

こういう心細くて胸がちょっぴり痛いときによく聴く歌がある。L'Arc~en~Ciel の「叙情詩」。it's a really good song. ちょっぴり切なくて胸がキュンってなる曲。大好き。

個人的には、この曲は「ナナ」というマンガのテーマ・ソングである。めちゃめちゃ「ナナ」を読んでいたころとめちゃめちゃ「叙情詩」を聞いていたころがちょうど重なって、ハチの失恋や他のキャラの切ない恋話（コイバナ）とすごく合ってたから。it's a really good song. i hope you guys get a chance to listen to it.

p.s. another good L'Arc~en~Ciel song is 「Daybreak's Bell」. こちらもまたちょっぴり切ないね。

Currently listening to: 叙情詩 - L'Arc~en~Ciel

泣き虫

常々思うのが、自分が泣き虫であること。i seriously cry so easily. everytime i see something sad or depressing, i cry. 例えば、さっき見た「ヴォイス」の第４話。it was really sad. 固い友情の話。泣けたね～。i won't write much else in case i spoil it for someone else.
でも、泣いた後はスッキリする。なぜでしょう？o well. イヤなこととかあれば思いっきり泣けばいいんだよね。その方が本当にスッキリすると思う。i really don't think crying is a bad thing. it's normal. 涙流さない方が逆にツライと思う。素直が一番。

Currently listening to: 刹那 - GReeeeN

Cuba

i've never had a good image of Cuba. i mean, i live in the U.S., our education is probably built in such a way as to create a bad image of Cuba anyways. can't really blame me, can you? でも、それが今日ガラッと変わった。大学はやっぱ違うね～。or maybe, the U.S. is changing. who knows? either way, Cuba has come into really good light in my mind.

it's really pretty, isn't it? i might want to go...

in my latin american studies class today, we watched a film titled "Salud!" meaning health. このフィルムはキューバの health care system に関するフィルムでいろんな情報満載だった。what's interesting in Cuba is that even though there still exists poverty, everybody is guaranteed health care for free. that's amazing.

even more amazing is the humanitarian outreach program that they do. キューバのお医者さんはいろんな外国の国に飛んで貧民を助けてる。地元のお医者さんが行きたくないほど貧乏な地域にまで行き滞在し、治療を行う。なかなかできることではない。i mean, most of these places have no electricity and running water. you're completely cut off from the modern world. that's really tough. 超尊敬。even former President Jimmy Carter spoke very highly of Cuba in this sense. it is very admirable.

Currently listening to: How to save a life - The Fray

雹

man, i had heard that a storm was coming but this is insane. 雨がうるさいなぁ～って思って外に出てみたら、雹（ひょう）だって。freaking hailing. unbelievable. i hadn't seen hail since like freshman year of high school. haha

it wasn't this bad, but you get the point..

and omg, the thunder. ちょー雷鳴ってた～。ちょっぴり怖いぐらいに。i would totally be freaked if i were driving. haha. thank god i'm not. lol. but seriously, this is some funky weather we're having...

Currently listening to: Praan - Gary Schyman

Shooting

i was coming home today when i heard the name "san gabriel" on the radio. i was listening to kfwb news 980 and they were reporting on a shooting that had occured in a cafe on valley blvd. last night. マジコワイ。ウチに超近い。地元でこんなことが起こるとは夢にも思わないよね。apparently, this happened somewhere near the my old high school.

こんな田舎町でもたまにはこんなことが起こるんだね。最近の世の中は物騒だから皆さん気を付けてくださいね。especially late at night, since this happened at about 11 p.m.
とりあず、雨は週末ずっとらしい。maybe that's good since it won't make me feel like going out too much. i seriously have some reading to do...大学は大変じゃぁぁぁぁぁぁ。


----- update ------

so, the shooting occurred at the corner of san gabriel blvd. and valley blvd. which is pretty much right next to my old high school. 1 dead, 6 wounded. 2 gunmen shot into a cafe. i've been to the popeyes and the photo store in this plaza a couple of times so this is pretty freaky. here is the full story.

Currently listening to: With you - Chris Brown

ひねくれ者

だと思う。自分が、ね。素直になれないって言うか、何て言うか。損な性格ですね。カワイクできない。しようと思っても何したらいいかわからない。i always end up making situations that much worse. i'm such an idiot. 何か、「ごめんなさい」って言うのヤダ。負けてるみたいで。but i always end up saying it. 嫌われたくないから。でも、言いたくて言ってるわけじゃないから、その後も結構ご機嫌ナナメだったりする。*sigh* life is so hard...

maybe it's this rain that's making me so depressed. i want to go home now... (i'm at work right now) but then, i have to walk home in the rain.... i forgot my umbrella at home... -_- 私って本当にバカねぇ。。。

-------7:07 p.m.--------

人生うまく行かないのが基本。泣きそう。疲れた。

Currently listening to: らいおんハート - Smap

Hopeless Romantic?

i think i might be. i was watching Music Station SP where they had this 平成うた・昭和うた ranking thing and most of the songs i like were the romantic ones. hehe. examples:

らいおん・はーと - Smap
そばにいるね - 青山テルマ feat. SoulJa
ラブ・ストーリーは突然に．．．- 小田和正
White Love - SPEED
TRUE LOVE - 藤井フミヤ
LOVE LOVE LOVE - Dreams Come True
世界中の誰よりきっと - 中山美穂・Wands
I Love You - 尾崎豊

などなど。あはは。いい曲ばっかですね～。

another reason i think i might be a hopeless romantic. last night, my bf was supposed to come see me but found out he had work at 7 a.m. so decided not to. ま、仕方ないじゃん？で、today, he ended at 1:30 p.m. so i thought he MIGHT come see me, since i ended at 4. そんな訳ないじゃんね～。淡い期待でしたね～。ちょびっと凹んだね。はは。

Currently listening to: ラブ・ストーリーは突然に．．．- 小田和正

Seoul, Korea

a man confessed to raping and killing 7 women this past december. on top of that, he says he plans on writing a book about his experience. 怖くない？マジヤバイよね。

for the full story, click here.

韓国って性的犯罪大国なんだって～。知らなかった。女の子にとっては怖いよね。

korea also has some interesting commercials. like this DHL one. very lol. :) hehe. hope you have fun.Currently listening to: GREEN - 浜崎あゆみ

Octuplets!?

that's an unbelievable amount of babies to have at once. i don't plan on having any kids but man, gaining 8 at once is.... freaky? 信じられないよね。

well, it happened in whittier ca. that's pretty close to where i live. all thanks to artificial insemination. -_- そこまでして子供欲しいか？っていうのが、this lady already had 6 other children, ages 2-7, when she had her octuplets a couple days ago. all of them through the same process. マジで！？って感じだよね。しかも未婚。しかも、実家暮らし。ありえん。the family filed for bankruptcy a couple of years ago too. ホント、どうするつもりでしょうね。そんなとこに生まれた子供もかわいそう。まともに養えないじゃん？

anyways, if you want some more details, click here.

Currently listening to: TABOO - 倖田來未

プレゼント

プレゼントラッシュが待ち受けている．．．買いたいものありすぎて選べない。彼にプレゼントを買うときはいつも悩む。しかも、めっちゃ早くから。だって、いまから半年くらい先にある彼の誕生日のプレゼントも実は言うと考えつつある。wanna know why?? because it's freakin' hard to shop for that guy. he pretty much buys everything he wants and things he wants that he doesn't have are really expensive. (hence, he can't get them...)

とりあえず、Valentine's Day, 2nd Anniversary, and Birthday. those are the things i need to plan for. i have 3 gifts that i think are good ideas. i just need to figure out when to give what. それが大変なんだよね～。タイミング逃すとアイツ自分で買いそうだからなぁ．．．

ま、自分のプレゼントに関しましたは、なんでもいいって言ったらウソになるね。but i'll be content with most things :) でも、やっぱ可愛いアクセは女の子にとっては嬉しいプレゼントだよね。other than that.... i'm not sure what i really want other than that.... hehe. i'm sure i'm not that difficult a person to shop for, right?? (you might want to ask my bf about that before you take my word for it ;)

Currently listening to: M～もうひとつのラブストーリー～ - RSP