悪い女？

たまに自分で自分がすごい悪い女だって思えてくる。それには色々理由があります。。。

i can lie with a straight face and sometimes, not even feel that guilty about it. if it suits my needs, i can lie. blatantly. i mean, it's not like i do it to hurt people. but if it will help me from being hurt, i'll be more than happy to lie. これは小さい頃からだね。自分の都合のいいように嘘付いてきた。そのうちバチが当たるかも。

i can also be quite manipulative. i'm passive aggressive. i can somewhat make the people close to me move in the way i want them too. いい例が彼。i like to make him feel guilty towards me. 何か、そういう時って自分が愛されてることを確認できる。サイテーだよね。i mean, that's not the only time i feel loved. でも、たまにね、再確認したくなるのかも。i'm gonna try to stop.

i'm not a good person. i try to be, but i'm usually just scared of getting hurt, so i play "the good girl". in real life, i'm nothing like that. but i kinda hope i can actually become that good girl, if a pretend hard enough.

Currently listening to: How to save a life - The Fray